Wishing It Was '05

by Peter Stein, pstein@rivalfish.com

After watching the White Sox drop game after game, I have begun to realize that anything from 2005 is over. The team is headed the wrong direction and needs to rebuild in a suddenly impossible division. After winning 90 games last year, I had hope going into this season, but they are an absolute disaster this year. A team that was supposed to be high on offense is the worst in baseball and features feared sluggers such as Luis Terrero, Jerry Owens, Andy Gonzalez and Rob Mackowiak on a nightly basis. The bullpen might be one of the worst ever, seriously. But instead of doing the usual bashing of Kenny Williams (I could have told you this bullpen was going to suck), Ozzie, and Greg “I have a job?” Walker, I am going to say something else. This is how this team is supposed to play. Everyone says that they underachieved last year, following the 2005 championship. Heck, if you ask me they were overachieving last year too. Let me so you just how special (by that I mean lucky) the 2005 championship team was, comprised of a bunch of misfits who came together to simultaneously have career years.

The clubhouse: Could players actually know what was going on and were they even able to communicate with each other? The team consisted of two Cuban defectors, two Japanese players (to start the year at least), one legally insane person (Carl Everett), and a mix of Spanish speakers, a bunch of rednecks, and a Juan Uribe. As Ozzie said, there were four languages spoken in the clubhouse: English, Spanish, Japanese, and whatever the hell Juan Uribe spoke. Needless to say, it would have been an interesting clubhouse to spend a day in, let alone a year. Now let me take you through the key players and show either how crazy and much of a misfit they were, or how they overcame such great odds to have a good season.

1. Scott Podsednik – Misfit/Career year. A guy who didn’t play a full year in the majors until he was 27, had one good year and one bad year before coming to the Sox. Although he had stolen 70 bases in 2004, the Sox had shipped off one of the AL’s best sluggers, who was entering his prime, and replaced him with a scrawny leadoff hitter who batted .244 had got on base 31% of the time. Just the type of guy you want to lead the team in at bats. However, we all know what Podsednik did – getting on base, stealing bases, and frustrating the shit out of opposing pitchers. He really set the stage for the Sox.

2. Tadahito Iguchi – Misfit. Not looking forward to Willie Harris playing 120+ games, the Sox brought in a Japanese second baseman to fill his role. Of course, we all know how good the move ended up being. However, who saw this success coming? After the much more highly touted and highly priced Kazuo Matsui flopped at second base for the Mets, Iguchi definitely surpassed the general expectations.

3. Paul Konerko – Career year. You might not think Konerko belongs in a list with these other guys, having produced big numbers before and after 2005. However, as well all know, especially right now, this guy has a tendency to slump…not just a couple weeks, but for half of a season (see ’02, ’03, 07). Look up his numbers. Somehow in ’05 Konerko managed to stay productive, and seductive, every month. Does Konerko give you a Bonerko?

4. Carl Everett – Misfit/Career year. I could write 200 pages here. Known as a clubhouse cancer, Everett was instrumental in the Sox success, filling in for the Big Hurt (literally). Good thing Everett never misunderstood any of his teammates’ sexuality, because he would “consider retiring” or “set them straight.” I have a personal story with Carl. In 2003, I went to Boston to watch the Sox play the Sox. I stayed at the same hotel as the players, and following the win I saw Carl and said, “Now you just have to catch the Twins, Carl.” He replied, “Catch the Twins? We just caught ’em today.” Although the Twins did lose that night, the Sox did remain one game back. Oh yeah, just a half season after hitting 23 dingers and driving in 87, he is out of major league baseball.

5. A.J. Pierzynski – Misfit. At bat and behind the plate, you pretty much know what you are getting with A.J. He had his best power year with the Sox, but didn’t really overachieve. But he sure is a misfit. I don’t really even need to explain. However, see what winning does? People love A.J. when he is on their side and when they are winning, but Mark Buehrle has already spoken out about Pierzynski’s outburst/actions this year. Put him on a team with Everett again and I bet they would put Zambrano and Barrett to shame. I couldn’t put it any better than Ozzie himself, “"When he's on the other team, you hate him. When he’s on your team you hate him less.”

6. Jermaine Dye – Misfit/Career year. Okay, I know that the career year came last year. However, his second half and postseason was ten times better than his previous five injury-riddled seasons. This is why he was a misfit. Jermaine who? It had been five years since his all-star season with K.C. In ’05 he was regarded as a washed up player who couldn’t play more games in a season than Mark Prior. Then he comes to the Sox and the only thing that can keep him out of the lineup is a spider bite. The Sox threw a few dollars at him and got one of the best bargains in baseball. Now he sucks again.

7. Juan Uribe – Misfit. Scroll down a bit and see Angry T’s article. 1) He has shot someone. 2) He swings harder than Mike Tyson. 3) If he actually hit a homerun every time he puts his hands up, we wouldn’t be worried about Bonds passing Aaron. By the way, if Jeter made those last two plays of the World Series it would be like that tag he had on Giambi and we would see it on highlights for the next thirty years.

8. The Starters: Career Years/Misfits. Just look it up. Mark Buehrle, Jon Garland, and Jose Contreras all enjoyed the best year of the career in 2005. Orlando Hernandez gave a handful of masterful starts before getting hurt (who didn’t see that coming) and Brandon McCarthy pitched the best he ever has in 2005. Hernandez is doing it again with the Mets and McCarthy sucks now (go John Danks!). As for the misfit part, Orland Hernandez and Jose Contreras are each probably four years older than they claim to be. They say El Duque is older, but if you ask me Contreras is his father.

9. The Bullpen: Career Years. Honestly, how lucky can a team be? After Takatsu started sucking, the Whitesox should have been dead meat. But no, Dustin Hermanson decides to step up and save 34 games and post a 2.04 ERA. Pretty good for a guy with a career 4.21 ERA. And what happens when he struggles/gets hurt? The Sox bring up a 24 year old with a shaky past from AA to take over the closer role. He dominates and continues to do so in the postseason. Not a career year, because the guy is still doing it. But isn’t he a little bit of a misfit? He was so much trouble the Angles that they just released him…and his 100 mph fastball. The two setup men for the Sox, Cliff Politte and Neal Cotts, each had more of a career in one season than Don Mclean did in his one hit song ‘American Pie.’ Politte: 7-1 with a 2.01 ERA and half a year later he is out of baseball with a career 4.40 ERA. Cotts: 4-0 with a 1.94 ERA and in the following season posts a 5.17 ERA. According to my calculations, the chances of this bullpen coming together to be this dominant was approximately 1:743,432.25.

A lot of these guys are gone now and unfortunately some are still around. But, the point is that most of them suck. Vegas had these guys 30-1 to win the World Series; I think 60-1 would have been more appropriate. I shouldn’t be too harsh, but the current losing is getting to me. But I think this shows just how special, magical, and unlikely the 2005 Championship was.